I’m watching the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade. It’s something I usually do if I don’t forget, if I’m not sleeping, or if I’m cooking. Thank God I don’t have to cook. Today, I almost missed it because I was venting. What my tirade was about is best left for another day. Today I’m focusing my energy on the things that I’m grateful for and bring me joy.
I was going to write this anyway. After reading Tracy’s post over at FEC THis, I have a few more hints on what I want to say.
Despite the historical aspects involved in this holiday, I like to focus on the fact that it does bring people together. Even if it’s for a few hours. Some people can only play nice for a little while. I’m that way at times. Today I’m going to get hugs and kisses from people who love me, even if they don’t always show it in a way that makes me feel gooey inside. I’m OK with that. The food and drink will be good. Then my cousins and I will laugh at the family in the living room. They’ll be eating and watching Lifetime while talking to the television attempting to direct the characters.
Comfort and joy are usually reserved for Christmas carols. As I woke up this morning in my bed, having slept blissfully undisturbed by my neighbors or a telemarketer, as I opened the curtains and was washed in a blaze of sunlight that warmed me, as I smelled the after scent of baking from the night before, as I took that first sip of fresh coffee, and yes as I watch the parade; I’m aware of the comfort in my life and the joy it brings. Too many people don’t have half of what I do. I’m not living the high life. Just mindful that what may seem like not enough for me is just right for others.
I write this next part with a slightly heavy heart. Don’t worry, still rocking with joy. The last few years I’ve seen a dramatic shift in the quantity and quality of the people in my life. I’ve lost friendships. I’ve lost family. I’ve come across people who touched me deeply but vanished. I’ve reconnected with loved ones I’ve known most of my life. And we’ve come to know each other in ways that only time and maturity allow for.
With that said, for all the shooting stars, those people who shined brightly and exited in a flash; thank you. Maybe you came to show me things I need to change. Maybe you filled a temporary need. Were you that nudge to get me moving again towards the woman I was born to be? I dunno. It doesn’t matter.
To my lovely constellations: Sometimes I may not see you beaming love down to me. I know you’re there. You always are. When the clouds part or my oblivious tendencies are brushed from my eyes, I see you. And I’m so grateful for your understanding, your warmth, your humor, and your love. Even when your personal struggles eclipse what I feel are my trivial issues, you take a moment to listen, to laugh with me, and love me through it all. That means more to me than I can articulate here. Please accept my simple thank you knowing that there are mountains of words and overwhelming emotion behind that small phrase.
Well, I better go now. There are yummy dishes, refreshing drinks, hearty laughs, and memories to get to. Enjoy your day everyone! Even if you don’t celebrate Thanksgiving, everyday brings an opportunity to find something and someone to give praise for having in your life. So get to it!